2024-05-19

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time:: 30

characters:: 279

pattern:: 1) It almost seems unfair how potent this feeling of resistance is because it is only present when you think about doing things that are genuinely good for you 2) What's the deal with that? - what is the problem? 3) Why does it seem like life is set up that way? 4) Wouldn't it be better when you just enjoy doing difficult tasks?

I am sick and tired of being a quiet Asian girl in a room. In America, knowing how to express your present and knowing how to ask a good question in a meeting is the same as proving how good of a work you are in a team. However, I have been having a hard time bringing my own opinion to a meeting. I mean English is my second language. It almost seems unfair how much effort I need to put into the same meeting to understand and communicate with people in a meeting. I am the one who decides to stay in America and beg people to hire me. So I can't complain about that. Wouldn't it be better to suck up the reality and focus on how to improve my English instead of getting depressed and complaining about my life? It doesn't matter how privileged my background is, there are more privileged people in life. Why does it seem like life is set up that way? I am going to get through it by myself. so what's the deal with that? avoid it or face it?

I am sick and tired of being the quiet Asian girl in the room. In America, knowing how to express yourself and ask good questions in a meeting is the same as proving your value as a team member. However, I have had a hard time bringing my own opinions to the table during meetings. English is my second language, and it almost seems unfair how much extra effort I need to put in to understand and communicate with others in these settings.

I mean, I can’t complain about that as I am the one who chose to stay in America and asked people to hire me. So, Wouldn't it be better to face reality and focus on improving my English instead of getting depressed and complaining about my life? It doesn’t matter what my previous background is; there are always people who have more advantages. Why does it seem like life is set up that way?

I am determined to get through this on my own. So, what's the deal? Should I avoid it or face it?